20th Century Lizzie

Bridget Jones's Diary

Author:
Helen Fielding
Publisher:
Penguin Books (1996)
Number of Pages:
307
Review: “It is a truth universally acknowledged that when one part of your life starts going okay, another falls spectacularly to pieces.” Women in their thirties are expected to be well read in subjects such as history and literature, should be married and have produced at least one offspring, be well versed in poetry and play at least one instrument but most of all they should have a firm grasp of handling the housework. Fortunately we no longer live in the 18^th century but that doesn’t mean women still aren’t pressured to follow these rules of proper womanhood. And when Bridget Jones’s tries to fall for the kind of man that would render her the epitome of a Jane Austen heroine, hilarity ensues.

Bridget Jones finds herself starting the new year thirty, unmarried and with no prospects for a husband. Thus she decides to start a diary in an attempt to change her life. When her mother insists on her meeting the mysterious Mark Darcy, Bridget’s excitement slowly dwindles as she realizes that he isn’t the man of her dreams. Thus more determined than ever to change her life, she starts a fling with notorious flirt Daniel, learns (or attempts) to cook, tries to patch her parents broken marriage, embark upon a new job and finds herself in situations that only a young woman in the 20^th century could discover.

Bridget Jones is one of those novels that can pretty much sum up every working single girl living in the western world today. “I am a child of Cosmopolitan culture, have been traumatized by supermodels and too many quizzes and know that neither my personality nor my body is up to it if left to its own devices. I can't take the pressure.” Society has put such high standards upon us and sometimes it just gets overwhelming. I really liked Bridget Jones, and being a young lady who is also single I can often empathize with her. She’s snarky, and witty, slightly shallow, but deeply caring, but most of all, she’s realistic, to the point that she could have been my best friend, heck I think she is my best friend, and my mother, and me for that matter. Helen was able to invent characters so realistic that if you give this novel to any female today, they will find at least one person they know in this novel.

Her mother is fantastically clueless. Always meddling in her affairs and quite frankly treating her like a 12 year old instead of the 30 year old she really is: “Don't say 'what,' say 'pardon,' darling.” I felt every cringe she felt towards her mother. Her friends are wonderfully pathetic and supportive. From the fiercely independent feminist to the melodramatic homosexual, they embody the characteristics of a 21^st century human being. And Daniel being the first main love interest is every guy I’ve ever dated, completely shallow, oversexed, obnoxious, arrogant, and yet gets away with it all because of his pretty face. Sure Bridget may have rushed into the relationship but can you blame her, she’s thirty with no prospects, if it was me I’d jump on that roller coaster too. And her constant dieting shows the exact pressures our society on women and body image.

As for plot, I have to say there were a few times I was confused with what exactly was going on. I had to reread entries and try to decipher what she was talking about especially when she was drunk. I think this had a lot to do with the actual writing style. Fielding writes in broken sentences, almost like jot notes, but it works well because of the format, some people write diary entries with abbreviations and unformatted sentences, Bridget Jones definitely did. While the writing style takes some getting used too, once you got into the groove of things the writing flows pretty well and the read becomes quite a quick one.

The light airy tone, combined with a universal plotline of love and loss, adding a bit of parental drama and a whole lot of hilarious and embarrassing moments, makes Bridget Jones’s Diary one of the most charming and accurate tales of a women in her thirties struggling to find a perfect life in a not so perfect world. I highly recommend this read to any girl (and boy for that matter) struggling to do the same. And please stay away from the Daniels of the world ladies; I’m sure even in this century there is a Darcy out there for us somewhere.

Happy Reading!

The Fellowship of the Mothership

Mothership

Author:
Martin Leicht and Isla Neal
Publisher:
Simon & Schuster (2012)
Number of Pages:
308
Review: “Really, for all the poetry in the world on the subject, when you get right down to it, it's mostly just boom! penis vagina.” What’s so funny about a school for pregnant teenagers? Well when you place the school in outer space and have a main character that is as sarcastic and witty as Elvie Nara… simply put: everything!!

Elvie Nara was just your typical teenager until she made the mistake of doing the horizontal limbo with the new hottie in school Cole Archer. To her surprise she found herself pregnant and when she told the dumb as a brick Cole he was going to be a father he skipped town, presumably never to be heard from again.  Her father decides that the best option for her is to attend the Hanover School For Expecting Teen Mothers, the only thing is, it’s in outer space. As if that isn’t bad enough, once she boards the ship she finds herself in the company of Britta (who didn’t need hormones to be bitchy) Coles girlfriend, and a slew of other weird characters. When the ship is invaded by this weirdo army commando, the girls find out their teachers as well as their boyfriends are not quite who they thought them to be.

I cannot write how much I loved this novel. Nothing I say could ever bring it justice but I shall attempt to do it justice. First let me say that it was the single most hilarious piece of literature I read in 2012 and probably my most recommended book. I haven’t laughed out loud (no really I let go of some unhealthy guffaws during this novel) as much as I did during this book than any I’ve read recently.  Elvie was such a dry, sarcastic and witty character I immediately fell in love with her. She reminded me of Juno and I think that’s why I loved her so much.

Elvie is different from your typical YA heroine. She starts off the novel pregnant. Yes people, she is not a virgin (insert gasp here). YA tends to villainize its non-virginal female characters, the male leads are almost always “experienced” but the females for some reason haven’t even had a proper kiss, which is why I found it so refreshing and unique to have the heroine be a non-virgin right off the bat. But aside from Elvie being Hymanally absent it was her personality that got me, and kept me reading. She is hilarious, more than hilarious! She’s mean, conniving, sarcastic, cynical, but there’s this vulnerability and loving side of her that makes her so human and real. Reading her story was like reading a person’s journal, you know if they were in space or whatever. If Jane Austin was a pregnant teenager living on a space ship in 2079 she would be Elvie Nara.

I loved the rivalry between Elvie and Britta; I also loved the fact that they both shared the same baby daddy. I mean we all know that Cole is hot but what are the chances he’d knock up two chicks at once? Well a very good chance considering Cole isn’t really a normal human boy.  Thus the disappearing act in the beginning of the novel. Cole’s love for Elvie and his affection for his children almost make you forgive him for neglecting them (and deceiving them). I also loved the fact that the authors didn’t dumb down their female characters. These girls were strong, fierce and ready for anything that came their way.

But my favourite character of all has got to be Elvie’s dad who has a solution for everything I mean how can you not love a man who is so prepared for anything he has a folder entitled "Folder three, scenario four: going into labor during a high-speed chase with extra-terrestrials.” Talk about a man who plans!

The plot is so much fun. There are not a lot of novels out there where you can say you had legitimate fun reading, but this novel it’s fair to say fun is in every atom of ink on the page. The commando takeover of the ship, the alien invasion, the sheer love between Elvie and her father, the love Cole shows his baby mamas, and every single strange, weird and hilarious scenario Elvie and the crew find themselves in makes this book my favourite read of 2012.

So if you haven’t done so yet I suggest you check out Mothership as soon as possible. It doesn’t seem to be as popular as the other books in the YA genre but search it out online from sites like Book Depository or Chapters Online. I really recommend this book and think that if you enjoy weird and sarcastic humour you will most definitely appreciate this jem of a novel.

Happy reading!

A Fantastic Job

A Dirty Job


Author: Christopher Moore

Published:
William Morrow (2006)

Number of Pages: 400

Review:
“So now you’re death…”  and you have the daunting task of visiting every dying person in San Francisco and collecting their soul vessels all the while being attacked and followed by death demons in the form of giant birdlike creatures - Sewer Harpies (complete with skulls and chicken legs) - and as if that wasn’t bad enough your only daughter is death’s spawn! For all you desk hoggers out there who think your job is bad, just think of poor Charlie Asher – the quiet, spineless beta male - who following the death of his wife found himself to be a death merchant.

Charlie Asher was as normal as a man can be, living in San Francisco and married to the beautiful Rachel Asher who was pregnant with her first child.  He owned a small used clothing shop which employed a young Gothic girl named Lily and a pornographic obsessed ex-cop named Ray.  Aside from his wife there were no shining beacons in his life, until the death of his wife brought him face to face with Death – well actually his minion  who in turn somehow initiated him into the death business and opened his eyes to the millions of shining beacons across the city.  And all of these beacons shined red.  As a newly appointed minion of death along with your death manual, you soon find out that you must scour the city of the left over souls of dead people and ensure that they are given to their new rightful owner.

Christopher Moore has written a hilarious and unapologetic tale of good vs evil. You cannot help but fall in love with the world he has created in this novel.  Charlie is hilarious and his sidekicks Minty Fresh, Ray and Lily carry the story beyond just a hunt for souls but a quest for survival. Sophie is tres adorable, her killer word was a wacky twist added to the plot and you can’t help but love her even though she is death in the flesh! Her babysitters are stereotyped galore and I didn’t care because it was so damn hilarious. His quirky sister, Jane (the true alpha male in the family) looks better in his pant suits than he does and is portrayed as the butch lesbian she is, which makes the reader, even a conservative one, fall for her.  Moore is who he is and plays women as sex objects and plays on stereotypes and yet doesn’t take it to an unhealthy and insulting extreme.

Moore uses the subject of death as a focus on the light instead of the darkness of it. He throws in humor, puns and ironic situations that will have you laughing at death and leave you looking forward towards living your life.  The throwaway humour and wordplays on life are wonderful and reading this book does in fact challenge you to look at life and death different, not in a sense of doom but to laugh at death and live your life the way you want too.  He takes a simple concept and turns it into an adventure, for that is truly what death is… an adventure.

Happy Reading!!!